A Family Lawyers Guide to a Good Relationship

03 Feb 2018

So what factors does Cupid need to take on board when considering what is likely to make a long and lasting relationship. One which will stand the test of time? With February comes Valentines Day, considered to be “the most romantic day of the year”, having its origins in a Roman festival where Cupid the god of desire and son of Venus the goddess of love would match and pair off couples with a view to their future marriage.

As a Family Lawyer you come to identify a number of key factors or qualities which may demonstrate whether or not the relationship is likely to prove to be the right one. These can include:-


Are you open and honest with each other? Can you trust your partner not to hurt you? Suspicion or mistrust can build barriers within your relationship.

Decision Making

When it comes to those big decisions that need to be made, do you do them together, for example; moving house, or buying a car? If those decisions are made unilaterally this often results in friction and resentment. If there is a joint commitment, this brings with it stability.

Staying as it is

If you both like and get fulfilment from the relationship as it is, then it is probably the right one for you. If you are awaiting a change or for something to work itself out, that is often a sign of discontent.

Allowing each other space

Clearly joint interests are very important to a relationship. Also, allowing each other space and time to pursue your own interests. The chances are that your relationship is in a good place if, when out without your partner, you do not receive text messages every five minutes asking where you are or when you will be back.


The ability to speak your mind or the truth without the fear of causing upset. There is nothing wrong in having a difference of opinion. A successful relationship is often one which allows for healthy debate.


The balance of a relationship is important. Both playing your part and for there to be give and take makes for a happier and healthier relationship.


We need to be touched. It brings with it a feeling of security, trust and support. The greater the physical affection, the more positive the relationship.

Working at it

Finally avoiding complacency. Good relationships do not just happen, they need to be worked at and will evolve and adapt over time.

Not all relationships are the same but experience has shown that the factors I have identified above are factors often present when determining if Cupid’s arrow has flown true.